Horror-scopes, Nov. 1

Published: Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Updated: Wednesday, November 2, 2011 12:11

Let me tell you your future, you weenie.

Aries: March 21–Apr. 19

No one will appreciate your pageantry this week, Aries. Not even the glitter cannon.

Taurus: Apr. 20–May 20

This week you should focus on stepping up your game in the bedroom. Your roommates have noticed a serious increase of batteries and Vaseline in the garbage.

Gemini: May 21–June 21

You'll get into a verbal disagreement with one of your friends this week, and it will probably result in two days of uncomfortable silence between the two of you. Cut that silence by playing Evanescene's new album on repeat.

Cancer: June 22–July 22

One of your friend's significant others will make an inappropriate comment about you this week, Cancer. You will destroy their relationship regardless of how you react to it.

Leo: July 23–Aug. 22

Now might be a good time to stop communicating with all of your exes. Someone's got a new beau, and they are crazy jealous. Like, smash your car crazy.

Virgo: Aug. 23–Sept. 22

No matter how hard you try this week, Virgo, a rogue fart will slip out in the elevator. Should have skipped on the curry.

Libra: Sept. 23–Oct. 23

Avoid using any elevator anywhere this week.

Scorpio: Oct. 24–Nov. 21

Maybe next time you go out, Scorpio, you should ask one of your friends to take your phone away from you. Even though one person may have thought your drunk status updates were funny, everyone else (ie. your co-workers and parents) think you have a problem.

Sagittarius: Nov. 22–Dec. 21

Upon reaching the window at a drive-thru this week, the fast food employee will be visibly startled that there is only one person in the car to consume the amount of food that you ordered.

Capricorn: Dec. 22–Jan. 19

You cannot hide your facial expressions. Knowing this, when your best friend asks you if they look good this week, just walk away.

Aquarius: Jan. 20–Feb. 18

Despite your best efforts this week, Aquarius, you will succumb to all of the worst vices. Too bad you have no willpower.

Pisces: Feb.19–Mar. 20

Pisces, things may actually be looking up for you. Probably not though.

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Not everyone can be happy all the time

Unpaid parking tickets

Brock Parking is Fair, just pay for your parking and you know what...... they leave you alone. If you don't like it, park elsewhere.

posted by: Anonymous
If you can walk & talk

Funny list, except the author doesn't seem to know where Nipissing University is.

posted by: Anonymous
CUPE 4207-3 on strike

Calling all concerned Brock students: please take a minute to send an e-mail to cupe4207(at)brocku.ca to remind the union that their democratic right to strike should not automatically mean denying students their right to access the campus and the education that they have paid for. Please encourage them to protest in a way that respects the students they are trying to rally to their cause instead of alienating them. It only takes a minute, and remember, you pay their salaries!

posted by: Brock Student
Bill C-11 given student and educator-friendly amendments

So, if Bill C-11 passes into law, will downloading become illegal? If so, I'm going to download whatever I can while it's still legal.

posted by: JonBoy35
Conservative Party may have broken election law

- Regardless whether the robocalls changed the results or not .... the point is that what was done was illegal under the Canada Elections Actl!
And now, the latest violation of the Cons ... they had Front Porch Technologies, an American firm, actively knocking on doors and making calls to the electorate, in Canada! That too, is a huge violation of the CEA!! I believe at least a dozen Con MP's were helped in their campaigns by this group. Don't take my word for it - look them up on the internet; Dykstra and others, including harpo!! right there, as endorsements!! and pix of them campaigning right in Toronto!!
These bloody Cons think they can rub our noses in it forever, and we will just take it .....lol - the joke's on them this time - there is more than enough evidence to turf them out -and out they will go!
But Canada, this will only happen if we, collectively, stay active in exposing them and keep it in the media and on the street. Go to a peaceful protest if you can; (March 31) we need to let this fraudulent party know we aren't going to stop until we turf them out, and it won't be a 2015 election either!!

posted by: Cheena Eagle Graham
CUPE Unit 3 and IATSE 461 could strike

sooo any updates on this? I hear they're striking soon?

posted by: Marshal
It’s time to vote again

just found out about No campaign. I agree with it.

posted by: 22Anay
McGuinty attempting to cut teacher salaries

I think they mean "cut" as in "cutting wage increase." Deceptive title.

posted by: 224
A new breed of activism: unmasking Canada’s Anonymous culture

Does the statement "Dear government, dictators and oppressors of freedom: You no longer represent me....." Is that how you view yourself in this country? Should we throw away laws, allow internet crime to flourish, just allow victims to continue to be victimized so that you can say "the people take back the power?" Should we contribute to misinformation in order to what? To serve our purposes not recognizing the consideration of others?
I guess I am a bit old-school, but my understanding was to learn all sides of the story, not just to react under an 'anonymous' slogan, hidden from my peers. Activism for a cause is justified, but just taking uninformed stances and trying to create laws under the name of "anonymous", to me, that sounds cowardly....at least here in Canada!
Sounds like another St. Patty's day in London, Ontario.....only over the internet! Who cares how victims might be affected.

posted by: Anonymous
McGuinty attempting to cut teacher salaries

Since your headline so boldly says that the government is trying to 'cut' salaries, can you show me where in this article any 'cut' is being proposed?

posted by: Not Anonymous