Back into your corner of the kitchen, woman

The fight for equality as a whole is perplexing. Any logical individual would assume that every human should be treated equally, and that actions or words that are counter intuitive to that are outdated ideals not welcome in modern society. Yet, the term "equality" inherently promotes an "us" versus "them" mentality, one that pits two groups against each other, despite the logical outcome being that both are working towards the same goal. The feminist movement is no exception to this.

First and second wave feminists focused on overturning legal obstacles in their patriarchal society and realigning the place of women in society as a whole. The feminist movement now, for Woman of the university age demographic, is not what it was 50, or even 20 years ago. Society has progressed in a way that the issues that first and second wave feminists founded their beliefs on are not necessarily dominant within our local community, or even North American society as a whole. We are the third wave feminists – looking back on what the woman who came before us did for the movement, not completely relating to their plight, but still respecting their efforts and triumphs. Yet, has society changed that much? Has the idea of equality for the sexes been laid to rest? No – not by a long shot. In the battle of "us" versus "them" — if the issue is to be reduced to such a basic and ignorant level — the "us", according to some, is Men, and the "them" has been shifted to the modern Woman.

Jim Wysong, author of The Neutering of the American Male, believes that media — specifically television shows that portray stay-at-home-dads or professional woman — are blurring stereotypical gender roles, resulting in individuals "living opposite his or her core" which leads to "stress, distress and dissatisfaction" or "psychological neutering".

"Most men are wired to be in charge; it's part of their DNA. They come into the world with a tendency toward certain masculine characteristics, for instance, a preference for building blocks over building relationships," Wysong said in a press release.

"Over the past century, gender roles have blurred, leading to some women developing more masculine qualities by necessity — think World War II, when they had to take the men's place in factories — and some men developing stronger feminine qualities, like sensitivity and compassion.

"The man's feminine characteristics overdevelop so his psychological needs can be met by the masculine woman in his life, be it his mother or his wife."

For some background on Wysong, he is an American businessman, contractor and real estate investor who has spent more than 30-years studying human behaviour via workshops, seminars and text books (in layman's terms – existing, and jotting down notes).  

"His efforts to better understand his own emotional discomfort led to theories that have universal applications in modern society," the press release said – whatever his personal mystical modern society may be.

To use the old stand-by media as the scapegoat for portraying "opposite" (assumingly Wysong's politically correct term for "unnatural") gender roles is a pathetic excuse for an argument. The idea of the nuclear family dissolved just about as fast as Wysong's career is going to – and to suggest that portraying anything different than that via mass media confuses gender roles is an undeveloped, narrow minded and antiquated belief.

When I see television shows that highlight women in professional roles, I do not, by any means, think, "Oh, wow – these gender roles are very confusing to me. I better change the channel for fear of neutering my boyfriend. I want him to build me a gazebo and pump me full of babies one day, so I don't want to water down his masculinity with things like sensitivity and compassion". Instead, I appreciate portrayals of modern life – be it woman in professional roles, men as fathers rather than workers, LGBT couples, mixed race or religion couples or anything that forces the audience to realize that society no longer has a "right" or "wrong" way of living. For Wysong to inherently suggest that it is now time for Men to stand up against the modern Woman for ruining his masculinity catapults any kind of human rights movement back to nonexistence. To shift the focus to how Women are now too powerful is outrageous and demeaning, back to the glass ceiling scenario of yesteryear – obviously still present in today's society.

You know what I see when I turn on the television? I see shows like Mad Men, the Playboy Club (despite its short run) and anything labelled "Woman's programming" that glorify and promote Women in subordinate roles, either in their professional and personal life. These shows are praised for their innovation, and adored with a cult like following by Men and Women. Presumably intelligent Women who heard of their mothers being denied jobs and pay increases based purely on their gender (Canada Post, anyone?), who still hear "she was asking for it" as justifications for rape and sexual abuse and have at least once in their lives been told "that's not very lady-like", yet still enjoy watching these types of shows. Third wave feminists that do not recognize how degrading it is to watch hours upon hours of shows related to weddings, how to look good or how to dress up your daughters to be pageant queens are not sitting back and critically analyzing what is put in front of them – they are accepting it as the norm, and potentially something to aspire to.