High Fidelity

Top-five bands NOT inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

By: Josh Learn

Posted: 3/16/10

As Canadian Music Week comes to an end, we are able to reflect on all of the great musicians that this great land has produced. Canadian Music Week acts as a perfect segue to an extremely prestigious event on March 15 in Cleveland, Ohio. Cleveland is known for many things big (Drew Carey…), though none may be as big as the Rock and Roll Induction Ceremony. This year is quite special, as it marks the 25th anniversary of the Hall's existence. The line-up of inductees is quite impressive, with a multitude of talented performers and non-performers. ABBA, The Hollies, Jimmy Cliff, Iggy Pop and the Stooges and, finally, Genesis are being inducted.
The Hall of Fame (HOF) has been marred with controversy for a great number of years. The main criticism is that the voting system is quite flawed, with a number of individuals on the board creating their own rules on the spot. It also does not help that the Hall is very liberal when inducting members of certain types of rock.
Groups and individuals are able to be inducted 25 years after the release of their first record. Although no quantifiable criteria exists, the group or individual must have left their mark on rock and roll in a significant way. The lack of quantifiable criteria makes the entire process subjective, which creates the controversy in the first place. After years of research, I feel I have developed a model of deciding what groups/individuals should be in the Hall of Fame. Here is the list of groups that should be in based on this "Einstein-esque" model:
5.) Deep Purple - Debut: 1968 - Records sold: 100+ million
Current status: Recording
Deep Purple has done it all in their illustrious careers. They are considered as one of the pioneers of hard rock, along with two other relatively unknown bands (Black Sabbath? Led Zeppelin?). At one point in time, they were even considered to be the "loudest band in the world" by the Guiness Book of World Records. Louder = better, but in this case, the HOF has silenced one of the most successful bands of all time.
4.) Alice Cooper (born Vincent Damon Furnier) - Debut: 1971
Records sold: 50+ million - Current status: Touring
Dubbed, the world's "most beloved heavy metal entertainer", Cooper has influenced a plethora of rock artists. His showmanship, shocking stage performances and use of horror imagery are all legendary and are considered to be pioneering. The School is Out on this one, as there will be No More Mr. Nice Guys if Cooper is ignored again next year. Sorry, I couldn't help it …
3.) Rush - Debut: 1968 - Records sold: 70+ million
Current status: Recording
Rush has not been put on the HOF's ballot since they were eligible in 1998. Rush currently ranks in fourth place (behind The Bealtes, The Rolling Stones, and Aerosmith) in the most consecutive gold or platinum albums by a rock band. Each band member has won several awards for their music ability and the band as a whole is considered one of the greatest trio's of all time.
2.) KISS - Debut: 1973 - Records sold: 100+ million
Current status: Touring
These masked demons had a taste of potential entry (it is fitting to add a sexual innuendo here) by being nominated for this year's induction. However, they were cut harder than a circumcision (founding members Stanley and Simmons are both Jewish, get it?). KISS symbolizes everything about rock and roll and have been rated one of the best rock and roll groups of all time by a number of reputable sources.
1.) Chicago - Debut: 1967 - Records sold: 120+ million
Current status: Occasional touring
Here is an equation for you - 22 gold albums + 18 Platinum albums + eight Multi-platinum albums + five "number one" albums + 21 top-10 hits + no hiatus breaks since 1967 = no entry into the Hall of Fame? Not inducting Chicago in the Hall of Fame is just as mind-boggling as Chewbacca living on Endor with a bunch of two-foot-tall Ewoks. It does not make sense!