The Brocktopus: 8 things that could happen by 2018

 

Brocktopus

1. Decreased student representation on the university Board of Trustees

According to the recent announcement by Board of Trustees, their plans to reduce the size of the board will take effect by the “2017-2018” academic year. Part of the reduction includes halving the number of seats devoted to undergraduate students, leaving just one seat to be held by the Brock University Students’ Union (BUSU) president. By the time you’ve read the rest of the list, it’ll be clear that this item was the inspiration for the list. For more info on the approved changes to the Board of Trustees, see page 7.

2. ~1.6 statues could be added to the Brock campus

By performing simple arithmetic, one can determine that by 2018 around one and a half statues could be added to the Brock campus. This is based on the fact that the commissioning of the newly installed statue of Sir Isaac Brock was announced in June 2013, and has arrived on campus a few months short of two years.

3. Brock will have a new president, and it could be…

The current search for the next president of Brock University is on, and there’s no telling who it could be. It’s actually a lot easier to tell who it won’t be. Based on our research here at The Brock Press, we can predict beyond a shadow of a doubt that the next president won’t be Iggy Azalea, obviously because she lacks experience as an administrator, despite her many other requisite skills. It clearly won’t be a dog, because, despite the multicultural nature of our great nation, if you want to be the president of Brock University, you do have to speak English. Also, it definitely won’t be Jian Ghomeshi, and we all know why.

4. Student votership will increase, probably

Every year BUSU does their best to boost student participation in their university governance. Because of it, bit by bit, the per cent of students turning out goes up a bit each year. Should this trend continue, by 2018 the turnout could be as high as 35 per cent! This, of course, fails to take into account the possibility that interest in local politics becomes a fad among of the youth of the future; you never know.

5. On-campus construction might be finished

For decades, Brock has been expanding its presence on campus, adding a building every few years. Only with the construction of the Marilyn I. Walker School of Fine and Performing Arts (MIWSFPA) in downtown St. Catharines did the expansion actually move off campus, but there’s still work to be done. The new upper-year student residence by McDonald’s is close to being finished, and with only a small amount of green space left, and the hope that road crews have had enough of disrupting traffic towards campus, it’s only just possible that in the next few years construction will finally be done on campus. For some of the lifers at Brock, whether custodians, professors of administrators, having a campus without a partially finished structure will surely be a welcome sight.

6. Brock’s arts programs may make up a larger part of the student population

As mentioned in the last entry, the MIWSFPA, to be opened this fall, will likely attract thousands of new students wishing to learn about visual, dramatic and musical arts in a brand new facility. Watch yourself, Business and Con. Ed students; the artsy kids are coming for you…

7. Every on-campus organization will probably have an app

In the next few years, any organization on campus that doesn’t already have an app will be force-feeding theirs to your phone. Some will be unnecessarily flashy, some will be disappointingly bare-boned, but take it in stride. It’s the future, and as such your phone will be the way campus groups reach out to you, instead of in Mac Chown A Block.

8. Brock could have a football team

Nah, jk. I mean, no one would really believe that, right?

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