The Brocktopus: 8 things you’ll miss from your holidays at home

BrocktopusEverybody loves going on holidays. Sure, there are parts you could do without, like having to find a present for that relative who seems to have no interests and needs nothing. There’s also the frustration of being asked, “How’s school going?” four dozen times in a single evening at your grandparents’ house. Even the last few days are sour, filled with packing away your stuff and grimly preparing for yet another semester. Despite all the bad, there’s a lot more that’s good about the holidays, of which the following eight highlights are just a few.

1 & 2. Home kitchen/home cooking
There’s no denying the wonderful, satisfying feeling of security that comes with knowing that your parents’ fridge (yours, once again, for a few weeks anyway) is stocked full of food just waiting to be eaten at your convenience. Whether it’s a well-rounded dinner of meat, potatoes and veggies, directly contrasted to your usual post-evening-class bowl of ramen or a midnight sandwich of your own design, the freedom to get food when and how you like without having to visit the grocery store yourself is a simple luxury.

3. Laundry
While not everybody has parents so wonderful that they’d do their laundry for them, nearly every student who’s home for the holidays can at least relish in the use of a washer and dryer that are both (a) in their own house and that (b) don’t cost a handful of quarters that you never seem to have when you need them. When you’re used to walking down the street to a laundromat, or even just a few floors down to the laundry room in your residence, doing a free load of laundry feels downright regal.

4. Binge-watching marathons
This ain’t no four or five episodes of Game of Thrones. This isn’t a single extended edition of The Fellowship of the Ring in a night. We’re not talking about the second season of House of Cards over a few days. Over the holidays, when you have nothing but time to kill in the least productive way possible, you put away the complete series of Sherlock without sleeping. You watch all of Freaks and Geeks in a day. You watch a week of Jack Bauer’s life in a week of your own. It’s lazy, bad for your eyes and probably unhygienic, but it’s the holidays and you’re a damn millennial. What else are you expected to do?

5. Weekday ignorance
It’s a rare and satisfying moment when you realize you don’t know what day of the week it is. You know Christmas is in a few days, and that your last exam was, like, a week ago or so, but that’s all you have by way of temporal reference. You are a happy wanderer, adrift on a raft in a sea of comfort food, classic movies and TV-shows-to-be-caught-up-on. You’re lost, but in a very, very fulfilled way.

6. Amenities
It’s a reality of living away from home and or on your own that the stuff you buy is cheaper, and you’ll likely drop the ball on occasion, forgetting to pick up toilet paper before you run out, or get milk before the closest store closes. You really know you’re home when the tissues are premium quality, the extra toilet paper rolls stack high around the bathroom and there isn’t a single no-name brand in sight.

7. Ignoring emails
With a few weeks until your first class and or first shift back at work in Jan, it’s nice to let your new e-mails pile up. Let that little reminder in red attached to the icon of your smartphone home page count higher and higher. Every day it dares you to check in on the travesty that is your inbox, and everyday you look down, consider, then shut off your phone, and roll over to tell Netflix that “yes, I am still watching Futurama”.

8. Consecutive sleep-ins
Even as an adult, nearly everyone gets to sleep in. Usually reserved for the weekends or that day of the week when you only have evening class, it’s nice, but you rarely get to do so the next day. Even then, at most, it’ll be two or three times before you’re up at 6:00 a.m. again to prep for that early seminar or shift. Given the weeks off over the holidays, it’s nice to have a week and never see the world before noon, at least while you still can get away with it.

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