The Brocktopus: 8 types of culture missing from Brock U student life

Brocktopus

At just 50 years young, Brock University is a tad immature in terms of the culture and traditions it can boast. While the stereotypical university experience may tell incoming students one thing, the reality at Brock is something else. Disclaimer: although these are absent parts of the Brock student culture, that’s not to say that they’re all needed in any way; traditions and beloved campus attractions should happen organically, not just because other schools had them first. That said, here are eight notable facets of culture you may have noticed have been missing from our beloved campus yourself.

1. Fight song

Honestly, these don’t even have to be all that creative. Compose a somewhat fast, rousing, simple melody that even the most “spirited” game attendee can remember; throw in some military terminology about Brock, some facts about the badger, a classic “Surgite” and bam: instant fight song useable for any rugby match, hockey game… or… condom poker night?

2. Campus pub

You know, the kind with old wood everywhere and a Badger beer of some type on tap? That does trivia, or karaoke once a week? Yes, I know we have Isaac’s, but that’s a bar and grill. They do the “bar” part quite well, and we should be thankful for such a large space like that on campus. That being said, it doesn’t necessarily have the feel, or the pub atmosphere (and nor should it), is all I’m saying.

3. Football team

Literally nothing more needs to be said on this topic. We all knew it would be on here, so let’s just move along.

4. Visible aging, wear and tear

Not unlike the Campus pub entry above, this has to do much more with Brock’s youth than any other item on the list. While we enjoy oblong, rectangular and generally modern architecture around campus, it’d be nice to have a few vine-covered red brick buildings, wouldn’t it? Something visibly old that shows Brock’s accumulated experience, not unlike a cool scar, or George Clooney with greying sideburns.

5. Brag-worthy celebrity alumnus

Nothing against Rick Campanelli, or that guy from Nickelback, but wouldn’t you like a bit more cred when chatting up your hometown friends about who went to other universities? Not that Marc Jordan isn’t a singing, song-writing, record producing, acting badass, but he’s also not necessarily a household name (but for real- look him up).

6. Weird student tradition

Some people dye themselves purple and beat their football field with leather jackets at halftime. Others lick the nether regions of a stone horse in downtown Toronto. These are likely among the tamer of the oddities that students subject themselves to in the name of school pride, and Brock apparently has yet to co-opt a weird tradition, perhaps another sign of its age. Maybe we could eat worms and grubs like our school’s mascot, or reenact key moments of the War of 1812 during pauses in the homecoming rugby match?

7. A marching band

While this is more of an American facet of college culture than it is north of the border, marching bands are no joke. What could instil more pride in its varsity athletes and more fear in their opponents than a coordinated mass of colour coordinated musicians moving in time whilst playing the deadly John Phillip Sousa?

8. Riots

This final entry is definitely a positive. Thanks in part to the laid back nature of our student populous and the efforts of Off Campus Living (you know, those Don’t Be A Donkey coasters?) Brock students have avoided destroying a part of their home city in a spirited rage. Let’s keep it that way.

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