The Brocktopus: 8 unique lessons you will learn as a Brock student

As a student you’ll learn many things. But unfortunately, finding square roots of this and that won’t prove overly practical. You’ve heard of “street-smarts” no doubt, but “hallway-smarts” is even better – and that’s what you’ll learn here at Brock. It’s a lot more than walking and talking. Here are the 8 unique lessons you will learn as a Brock student.


1. Firstly, as an important life skill, every Brock student learns not only patience, but how to deal with the hordes of incompetent individuals wandering through our halls. From those first-years that have no idea that there are two lines at the Tim Hortons, to the same students who seem to only get cell service while standing unaware in the middle of busy hallways.

2. As much as everyone at Brock is part of an often loving, caring and cumulative community, one lesson only some of us have the pain of learning is that — you can’t trust anyone. You weren’t the first one to over-pay on a used textbook from a peer and you won’t be the last. When it comes to business, some cheery students become Harvey Specter-esque business cut-throats apparently.

3. Although you may not have the classical training of an Olympian, sometimes it feels like you’re a hurdle runner. Going from a lecture in South block to a seminar room in Academic south more or less forces you to learn to run for your life. Forget Usain Bolt, he’s never made it to class two minutes early, after getting out three minutes late, while still having time to wait in line for Timmies. But you certainly have.

4. Another thing you might learn from attending Brock is a bit of fashion anxiety. You may be sitting at the computers in Fish Bowl, minding your own business (thinking you look pretty fly in your crop top and high-rise shorts, but after a few groups of people start looking at you, even the most confident badger might question their clothing choice.

5. Let’s face it, the reason no-one’s found the lost City of Atlantis so far is because they haven’t asked a Brock alumnus to look for it. It only takes a few months of living off-campus to become a professional decoder of mythological and un-translated maps and cryptographic sequences (also known as the St. Catharines transit schedule). Once you throw in weekend schedule changes, regional buses, or trying to get home after having a few pickle shots downtown, decoding secrets on the back of the Declaration of Independence seems like child’s play.

6. One thing every biking badger learns is endurance. Just try biking up Glenridge Hill. Go ahead, I dare you.

7. From classes that grade on a curve to trying to get into highly sought after programs — you will probably come to the conclusion that everything is a competition. When it’s between you and your bestie/roomie for who has to go to the Brock Hamilton Campus, it’s every man or woman for themselves.

8. Finally, and arguably the most important lesson you’ll learn from Brock is that the lecture lessons, whether they were scientific formulas and facts, or theories and critical lenses, won’t create everlasting individual change. It’s what you learn outside of the cramped seminar rooms and the distracting lecture halls that will decide what type of person you become. But seriously, I cannot stress this enough: there are two lines for the Tim Hortons on campus.

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