Unclassifieds – March 5, 2013

How do you submit an unclassified?
There are three ways to send in your unclassy! You can 1) tweet it to @UnclassBP, 2) post it on our Facebook page wall, or 3) for anonymous contributions, you can e-mail unclass@brockpress.com. Veteran readers take note: we no longer receive unclassified through cell texts, just the options above. Anything is welcome, so get yours in!

Remember: the Unclassifieds are entirely anonymous submitted content and do not represent the view(s) of the Brock Press or its staff. None of this content is being printed as inherently factual or “news”.

Also, due to the nature of Twitter, any tweeted unclassifieds will include your twitter username (because if people really wanted to know who tweeted it, they could just look up the @UnclassBP twitter account. Make sense?)If you would like to remain anonymous or give a different signature, email unclass@brockpress.com.

That’s all, email unclass@brockpress.com for info!

Seeking Health and Wealth
Seeking part-time and full-time business partners who are passionate and enthusiastic about helping others reach their health goals. Earn financial and time freedom, while gaining optimal health. Those who come on board are subject to win a FREE iPAD. Applicants must be over the age of 18.
Apply to angela.theuerle@gmail.com

Roly Poly Records & Retro
Booths 9, 10, 70, 71 in the main room of the St. Catharines Factory Outlet Flea Market

We have new & used records, CDs, DVDs, turntables, amps, speakers, vintage rock t-shirts (2 for $20), vintage leather purses, belts, boots, Docs, leather & jean jackets, ponchos, retro furniture and antiques, vintage home decor items, jewelry

I can get new in package needles for most makes. Prices range from $22-$38. Please email. I also have record brushes, anti-static mats and bottled record cleaner.

Every Sunday 9-4:30

Hey Tech Geeks, Business Buffs and Health Nuts…
Are you interested in sharing your knowledge and insights while developing and honing your writing skills? If so, then look no further – the Specialty section in The Brock Press is just for you. Rotating weekly through Technology, Health and Business, the Specialty section is always looking for new contributors who are interested in writing and would like to see their name in print.

If interested please contact Specialty News Editor, Bryan Medland, at bmedland@brockpress.com

Do you have a strong opinion you’d like to voice?
Are you interested in sharing your opinion on current issues, either local or global? Do you have strong opinions that you’d like heard? The Opinion Section in The Brock Press is always looking for contributors who want to share thier view of the World.

If you are interested please contact Opinion Editor, Dean Ellis, at dellis@brockpress.com

Not the best writer? We’ll work with you to improve your writing and get your story into an issue of The Brock Press.

Sos Brock Chapter
Wanna be productive this summer and not just try after reading week? Well Brock SOS is going to Nicaragua in August!! If you would like to volunteer feel free to ask us questions or check out our website for more details!

Let SOS prepare you for that material that your professor likes to add to the midterms/exams.


ISA has a biweekly event on 5th March
The International Student Association would like to invite you to our biweekly event. This event will be 5th March from 5:00-7:00 in WH203. The theme is about paper folding. We will provide some snacks and drinks. It is free for members and $2 for non-members.

Who likes a joke?
Why Does Ariel wear seashells?

-Because she can’t fit into D-shell

In response

In response to your editorial “keeping afloat as Brock sails into deeper waters”

I picked Brock over other universities for the same reason. My recent experience at financial services was similar to this. They made me feel like a child being scolded by a parent everything I tried to talk to them, in person or via phone. When I first came to Brock I valued being treated as an adult. 4 years later I don’t appreciate being spoken down to more then when I first started.

-Don’t change on us Brock! We love you just the way you are.

The extreme club
This week we will be having a race though Mackenzie Chown on the backs of vicious alligators. Spaces are limited, but more will become available as contestants drop out/die.
See you there!

-Horatio Nelson

Friday Flash Mob
This Friday is International Women’s Day! COme celebrate the resistance that women have been putting up, with a Flash Mob at the Penn Centre at the food court at 12:30 – 1:00 p.m.

Airplanes are designed to antagonize:
-One arm rest seperating two connected chairs
-The lean back function in the chair
-The wait time after landing before the doors open
-A middle seat between the aisle and window seat (noone wants you)

Blonde Jokes are the Best
Q: Why was the blonde so happy after he finished his jigsaw puzzle in only six months?
A: Because on the box it said From 2 to 4 years.

A blind man enters a Ladies bar by mistake. He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender: “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says: “Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair – giving that you are blind – that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I’m a 6 feet tall, 160 LB. blonde woman with a black belt in Karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?”

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and declares: “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times”.

IT Humour
During a recent password audit, our I.T. discovered someone was using the following password:


When they asked why such a long password, he said he was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.

Music at Mahtay
Come out and join your friends for an evening of music and comedy. Delicious food, tasty drinks, and great people will make it a night to remember. Pay what you can to support budding artists.

Friday March 8 @ 8:00 p.m. at Mahtay Cafe, located at 241 St Paul Street, St Catharines

The Amazing Line-Up:

Josh Di Iorio
Keeping Company
David Green
Knife the Wolf
Carly Manley (featuring her band Say Hello – Aaron Volpatti, TIm Stacey and Cody Caron)

-Looking forward to seeing everyone out!

Another Joke
A man with a cucumber in his ear, a carrot in his nose, and a tomato in his eye walks into the doctor’s office. He says, “Doc, I’m not feeling well. What’s wrong with me?”The doctor says, “First of all, you’re not eating right….”

Wassup, it’s me, your end-of the-section filler and you know what that means…. not enough content!
If you’ve got something to say, whether praise or criticism, joke or non-sequitor, complaint or confession, we aim to print it!
Send in yours today, the info is at the begnning of the section.
That’s all for now, hopefully you won’t see me next week…. 

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