Unclassifieds – February 5, 2013

How do you submit an unclassified?
There are three ways to send in your unclassy! You can 1) tweet it to @UnclassBP, 2) post it on our Facebook page wall, or 3) for anonymous contributions, you can e-mail unclass@brockpress.com. Veteran readers take note: we no longer receive unclassified through cell texts, just the options above. Anything is welcome, so get yours in!
Remember: the Unclassifieds are entirely anonymous submitted content and do not represent the view(s) of the Brock Press or its staff. None of this content is being printed as inherently factual or “news”.
Also, due to the nature of Twitter, any tweeted unclassifieds will include your twitter username (because if people really wanted to know who tweeted it, they could just look up the @UnclassBP twitter account. Make sense?)If you would like to remain anonymous or give a different signature, email unclass@brockpress.com.
That’s all, email unclass@brockpress.com for info!

Seeking Health and Wealth
Seeking part-time and full-time business partners who are passionate and enthusiastic about helping others reach their health goals. Earn financial and time freedom, while gaining optimal health. Those who come on board are subject to win a FREE iPAD. Applicants must be over the age of 18. Apply to angela.theuerle@gmail.com
Roly Poly Records & Retro
Booths 9, 10, 70, 71 in the main room of the St. Catharines Factory Outlet Flea Market
We have new & used records, CDs, DVDs, turntables, amps, speakers, vintage rock t-shirts (2 for $20), vintage leather purses, belts, boots, Docs, leather & jean jackets, ponchos, retro furniture and antiques, vintage home decor items, jewelry
I can get new in package needles for most makes. Prices range from $22-$38. Please email. I also have record brushes, anti-static mats and bottled record cleaner.
Every Sunday 9-4:30

Hey Tech Geeks, Business Buffs and Health Nuts…
Are you interested in sharing your knowledge and insights while developing and honing your writing skills? If so, then look no further – the Specialty section in The Brock Press is just for you. Rotating weekly through Technology, Health and Business, the Specialty section is always looking for new contributors who are interested in writing and would like to see their name in print.
If interested please contact Specialty News Editor, Bryan Medland, at bmedland@brockpress.com

Do you have a strong opinion you’d like to voice?
Are you interested in sharing your opinion on current issues, either local or global? Do you have strong opinions that you’d like heard? The Opinion Section in The Brock Press is always looking for contributors who want to share thier view of the world.

If you are interested please contact Opinion Editor, Dean Ellis, at dellis@brockpress.com

Not the best writer? We’ll work with you to improve your writing and get your story into an issue of The Brock Press.

HOLD THE PHONE!! Then hang up, before I throw up!
Wha Wha Wha Wha Wha What’s goin on with Unclassified!!? It is a Beautiful thing, not ad space or a recruitment page.
This page is down to a 1/2 page?? Oh No No No! All you Tammy-too-Busy’s and Adam-Avoiders need to get it together. So, here’s one lame alumni throwing down the call out, #NewsTeamAssemble style to get your lame comments, inside jokes and repetitive complaints on this page! You can bet your bottom dollar that everyone is sitting around looking to read about that couple upstairs keeping you up at night- YES, we want to hear about ‘The Rock’ up on floor 8 droppin’ the People’s Elbow on his girlfriend and whatever top-rope maneuvers he might be cookin up at 4am.
If you have an inside joke that noone will ever understand, then we are here hoping to figure it out and laugh uncomfortably on the bus ride home. How about the girl that passed you in the fishbowl that one time, 3 years ago and accidently winked in your direction? I bet that was Love! Now this is your chance man…but she’s waiting for you to mention it ON HERE

Let’s go Team, no one on your FB wants to hear it and no one knows what you’re even talkin’ about on twitter.
That’s all gang: Just makin a shout out to Dr. Hate- your girlfriend is a sorrier piece of meat, than the pork that comes in a can of beans.

-Silky Johnston

Justin Trudeau @ Brock Friday, February 8th 9:50-11am
Justin Trudeau will be visiting Brock this Friday, February 8th from 9:50-11am. He will be speaking in Isaac’s for roughly 20 minutes before mingling with people in the crowd and connecting with students. The event is free for anyone who wishes to attend – staff, students, faculty, community members etc. Come out and listen to the son of Pierre speak, who may just be our next Prime Minister one day!

ISA is Hiring…
Secretary (1 position)
Treasurer (1 position)
Finance Team (4 positions)
Engagement Coordinator #1 (1 position)
Engagement Coordinator #2 (1 position)
Engagement Team (8 positions)
Event Manager #1 (1 position)
Event Manager #2 (1 position)
Event Manager #3 (1 position)
Event Management Team (8 positions)
BUSAC Representative (1 position)
Photographers (2 positions)

Send your resume and cover letter to Ambika Sangaran
(as10rd@brocku.ca) by Feb 9th, 2013.

Hello thanks for reading me even though I am a lonely useless sentence who did not get a title or even any punctuation
Dear Unclass Readers,
The time is upon us again, that of Elections for the Executives of Brock University Students’ Union. For those of you that don’t know (or care) what that is- you should; if you still don’t though- then don’t vote. There is nothing worse than an uninformed voter. So for those of you that want to hear more: here goes! BUSU CONTROLS YOUR MONEY. Seriously. Look that up. www.busu.net. You are paying the salary of those people who you elect. Wouldn’t you want someone who is responsible with your money? That’s what I thought.
Get informed. #BUSUElections @BUSU_Elections @BrockTV @BrockBUSU

Just my opinion..
Someone using “Ermahgherd” as a marketing ploy to win the election for Vice President of Student Services? Yeah, that’s who I want getting a salary of approximately $35,000.00 for a student job. A job where your sole purpose is to plan, market and execute events? Is that going to be the theme of Oweek 2013 too?
You really couldn’t think of anything better than that? Come on.

Have you or someone you know ever tried the your hand at the World of online dating? Do you have any memorable, embarassing, ridiculous or sweet stories that you would like to share with someone looking to write an article about online dating in general? Participants can remain anonymous!!!!!!!

If you’re interested, please contant amihaljev@brockpress.com

Amanda Mihaljev, The Brock Press’ Senior Focus Editor


Had a long day?
Did you have a long day, can’t wait for it to be over? Well too bad cause the World hates you and so do I.

-Dr. Hate

God Got Lazy
After last weeks introduction we couldn’t help but give you more of gods lazy, half-assed attempts at creating bio-diversity.

– Rat (or homeless mouse?)
– Kangaroo (or large hairy frog?)
– Snake (or land-eel?)
– Donkey (or brain damaged horse?)
– Toad (or malnurished frog?)
Rhinocerus (or disfigured elephant?)
– Octopus (or steroid using squid?)
– Starfish (or did the ocean just do really well on a test)
Seagul (or feces with wings?) – seriously why do they poo white?
– Deer, Moose, Caribou, Reindeer (or horses with tree branches?)
– Tortoise (or Turtle who got lost on land?) 

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